Here are my belly pics from week 20.... and we found out that Little Buddy is gonna be a Big Brother to a Little SISTER!
It's a girl!!!May 27, 2009
May 13, 2009
"It's the Economy"
Yesterday, my husband learned that his company was cutting about 280 management positions, one of which was his. In addition to this, they didn't give much notice. They told him yesterday and tomorrow is technically his last work day, although he is still "an employee" through the 28th. As you can imagine, this news has created a whirlwind of emotions for us...especially for me. I've been angry because of empty promises made by his company, one of which was that his job/salary/title was guaranteed through at least the end of 2009. I've been scared because of the uncertainty of what happens now. I've been fearful of something going wrong with the child growing inside of me, due to the stress. I've cried so hard that my body has wretched and I couldn't breathe. It scares me that my blood pressure or something else could be out of whack because I'm so worried. And, then I worry about the fact that I'm worried and could be harming the baby. I feel helpless as a 4 months pregnant stay-at-home mother who is unlikely to be hired by any potential employers due to "my condition". Plus, child care would eat up any salary I'd make, most likely, so it isn't all that practical for me to try to work. But, because I can't really look for a job myself, I feel like a burden that my husband shouldn't have to carry. I'm confused about the best way to go for ensuring that we have adequate medical coverage after our insurance runs out through my husband's company. I can't believe this is happening. Yet, there is a part of me that sorta expected it, too. I think I've been waiting for "our trial" to happen. Our lives have been fairly smooth sailing and we haven't encountered too many significant trials, for which I'm grateful. But, I always knew that our turn would come. This may be our time.
For those of you who have called me, emailed me, tried to love me the past couple days, thank you. I apologize now for not being more interested in talking. I can't really talk on the phone without the tears starting to fall. I made the mistake of answering the phone this morning and learned this the hard way. No offense, Steph. I appreciate your call very much. But, I hated that half of the time I was silent because I simply couldn't speak through my tears.
Anyways, we covet your prayers right now.... especially that we would both feel God's peace, guidance, comfort, direction and calming spirit. If you know of job opportunities, we'd love to know about them too.
As a side note, my husband asked me yesterday how I'd feel about relocating, if we had to do that. I could hardly answer him because I felt so torn. On one hand, I feel like beggars can't be choosers and who am I to say I'm not willing to do what we need to do to survive? But, the truth is that selfishly, I don't want to move. I know. Surprising to some. For quite a while, we were both looking to move back "home". But, as the time has passed, I've started to become settled. We have developed such close, meaningful relationships with such dear friends and we have such a trusted, safe, important group of friends here. The idea of leaving them, and the family we have here to potentially move somewhere where we would have neither friends nor family just kills me. So, selfishly, I ask you to pray that we don't have to move and leave some of the most important relationships we have. Thanks.
For those of you who have called me, emailed me, tried to love me the past couple days, thank you. I apologize now for not being more interested in talking. I can't really talk on the phone without the tears starting to fall. I made the mistake of answering the phone this morning and learned this the hard way. No offense, Steph. I appreciate your call very much. But, I hated that half of the time I was silent because I simply couldn't speak through my tears.
Anyways, we covet your prayers right now.... especially that we would both feel God's peace, guidance, comfort, direction and calming spirit. If you know of job opportunities, we'd love to know about them too.
As a side note, my husband asked me yesterday how I'd feel about relocating, if we had to do that. I could hardly answer him because I felt so torn. On one hand, I feel like beggars can't be choosers and who am I to say I'm not willing to do what we need to do to survive? But, the truth is that selfishly, I don't want to move. I know. Surprising to some. For quite a while, we were both looking to move back "home". But, as the time has passed, I've started to become settled. We have developed such close, meaningful relationships with such dear friends and we have such a trusted, safe, important group of friends here. The idea of leaving them, and the family we have here to potentially move somewhere where we would have neither friends nor family just kills me. So, selfishly, I ask you to pray that we don't have to move and leave some of the most important relationships we have. Thanks.
May 9, 2009
All Grown Up
Seriously, when did my toddler become a grown boy? My mom dressed him in one of his little polo shirts and khaki shorts the other day. She also wet his hair and combed it over like a grown-up. These pictures were taken before he decided to run his hands through his hair and make it messy again. But, I couldn't believe it. Looking at him standing by the wall, with his hands in his pockets, he just looked like a kindergartener ready for the first day of school. I'm not ready for him to be all grown-up-looking yet. He's still my sweet little baby boy, isn't he?
May 2, 2009
Take A Bow
Little Buddy just loves his T-ball set. While practicing his swinging the other night, Daddy taught him how to take a bow. Too funny.
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